Salutations! I am a wishful mermaid who has a dream to live on the sea with a pet caribou, Sasquatch, and a loving dragon, with a wonderful wife who lets me write all day. But of course, we will always have a night to eat borscht and pumpkin vareniky and pickled herring, then cuddle on the couch and watch Juno and Bare while sipping chilled hibiscus tea. Enjoy the butternut squashiness!
~ Thursday, July 31 ~
lord of the flies
SUCKS TO YOUR ASS MAR
Every great leader needs a noble steed, right?
"BUT MY ASTHMA!"
"SUCKS TO YOUR ASS-MAR, PIGGY. SUCKS TO IT."
suxx 2 ur FRICKIN assma
Great Moments In American History: Leonardo DiCaprio and Jonah Hill congratulate each other for swimming with a topless brunette woman in Miami in February of 2013 while hiding their own shapeless bodies under modest t-shirts
~ Wednesday, July 30 ~
~ Monday, July 28 ~
but no dick
my sexuality is girls all the time and boys if they’re famous, almost offensively beautiful and completely unattainable so i can attach all my impossible ideals to them and never have to have anything to do with them irl
daniela sea is such a fucking cutie pie
~ Saturday, July 26 ~
he looks so pleased
"oh look. look at this apple. it me"
horf horf horf